Dance by definition is both a noun and a verb. Dance as a noun typically means a gathering of people joined by a common theme to partake in the verb of dance. Dance as a verb means to move one’s feet or body in either a choreographed or freeform way. Music is optional but most often present in both definitions of the word.
Dance: sometimes intimidating but often rewarding and in my mind, really fun.
Growing up, I took ballet, tap and jazz classes. I learned a lot and met tons of interesting and fun people. I grew in ways I never really thought about, especially in ways you never think about as a kid or teenager, like responsibility, the power of practice, dedication and commitment. As years moved on, I traded class and choreography for parties and disarrangement. Now, days are filled with slightly different views but a very familiar feel … it’s a new type of dance … my dance in motherhood.
There are days when I don’t know what I’m doing. I struggle and can’t catch the rhythm. I feel insecure, just like the first time I put on those new dance shoes. I look at some moms that make the dance look so easy. And I wonder why am I struggling with the steps that I so oftened dreamed would come to me naturally.
But there is a silver-lining. As I look back at what I created, at what we created, I’m reminded that my dance isn’t over. It will never be over. I will continue to have struggles. I will hesitate, stumble and make mistakes, but I will also be able to rejoice in exceptional “good enough” moments. I will, at times, celebrate great orchestrated feats.
I must remember that I have a lot if greatness to look forward to and the past steps are not a summation of my dance of motherhood.
Thank you for the inspiration, Sara.