OOPSIE DOOPSIE

The post is entirely and completely inspired by Scarlett’s confessional post. And I think a lot of us could benefit from just getting it off our chest, knowing we are not alone in this wonderful but sometimes exhausting journey of parenthood. I must admit to myself that I’m still in disbelief that I’m a mother. Not that I never wanted to be a mom. Opposite. It’s one of my callings, what I was put on this earth to do. It’s still a surprise, a heart-drop, a second-take to hear my little girl call me mama.

My second calling after a family? A career. I never really doubted this, but the temptation to stay with my daughter sometimes makes me weak in my knees, bringing me to tears, pulling at my heart and pleading with me to just figure out a way to make it happen. This moment is fleeting. I soon realize that what I ultimately want is … well, I want it all. I need it all. And, really, the definition of “all” is subjective. How I define “all” could be the complete opposite to you. I think that’s great. It’s perfect. And I’m completely satisfied with my all.

But having it all forces a person to adapt to change. Why? Because my two worlds often meet…every day, in fact…

As moms, whether you work out of the home or a stay at home, I think we sometimes take ourselves too seriously. We stretch ourselves thin, playing the comparison game, forgetting that we are pretty amazing in our own right. We get up and show up for our kids/family/friends every single day.  That in itself is pretty powerful. I continue to find sanctuary in that thought and place the mama guilt out of my heart’s reach. I can’t deal with that.

I refuse to let guilt get the best of me. Because the best of me is reserved for the loves of my life.

I’ve accepted…

.My daughter has one huge independent personality. She runs through a store and sometimes shouts. I don’t care. I love it. I’m not sorry if you get annoyed.

.I will be the first one awake and the last one to sleep. I don’t count the hours of sleep {or lack thereof} I get in a day/week/month/year. What’s the point? I’d rather save that amount of shock for some special occasion, like the first parent-teacher conference…first date…first traffic ticket…

.Dinners catered by the wonderful Ferraro’s or McAlister’s Deli is as good as it will get sometimes…and it feels wonderful. Tastes pretty fantastic, too.

.I do laundry all. the. time. It’s exhausting but my need to keep up with it so that I can have weekends free with my family and friends. If you can’t reach me in the weeknight evening hours, I’m most likely hanging out in the laundry room while my husband begs me to not do another load of laundry. {Yes, you read that right.}

.When you ask if my daughter has taken a nap today, what I really hear is, “Why is she fussing so much? You suck at parenting. DO MORE.” And I realize that’s irrational. But I can’t help it.

.Routines are important for little + big beings. But so are radical departures from those routines, like enjoying a day where we wear pjs all day, drink too much juice, have too much screen time and cuddle until we just can’t stand it anymore.

.Bribes work. But I call them “trades.” HUGE fan. She loves trading anything and everything with me.

.Starbucks dates happen. No, I don’t give her caffeine. She enjoys a huge oatmeal cookie or another sweet treat while I have coffee.

.During playtime, I sometimes pretend like I’m sleeping on the floor. She’ll put a blanket over me and say, “Night mommy,” and then plays quietly. It lasts about ten minutes. It’s pretty awesome.

.Picking out her outfits in the morning is sometimes a challenge. I L O V E getting her dressed, but every day she wants to wear a princess dress. It’s getting chilly so it’s just not in the cards. So every day, I let her wear a “princess shirt.” Every shirt she owns is a princess shirt…because I call it a princess shirt…

.My best friend and my partner in crime is the absolute best help I could ever ask for in my entire life. And I don’t tell him that enough. Love you, bubbs. {…and of course the rest of our amazing family/friends/schools are lifesavers.}

The list could go on and on and on as I’m sure you know.

It’s a sticky world but it’s all mine and I wouldn’t change it for 5 years the other way.

What about you – what’s your confession?

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Linking up with Jessica.